well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
