Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
