Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Dignity is for republicans.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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