I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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