Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize