i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
