Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
