this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all done wearing pants today
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize