I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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