New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
