everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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