I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
