i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
