all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
