every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
please don't ironically join a cult
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