I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
