What a fucking waste of an outfit
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
This is my gift to your gina
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize