Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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