when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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