i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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