Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
