So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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