She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize