How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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