I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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