You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
