in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Randomize