Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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