So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Randomize
