so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize