Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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