At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I think people are normalizing furries
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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