HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
