If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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