Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
