I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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