btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
