I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
3pm strippers are depressing
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
