i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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