Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
