you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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