he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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