Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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