why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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