Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
