Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
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