but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
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