Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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