Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
