It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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