Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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